Unfortunately Unoriginal

Which contributes to my abundance of mushy reblogs tonight, and by abundance I mean the whole 5 or 6 that I’ve posted which, for me, is a lot. Not that I don’t like mushy-lovey posts, I myself am a hopeless romantic who wears her heart on her sleeve, I just don’t reblog them a lot.

I’ve been feeling extra love-struck today because I basically got to spend an entire day doing nothing with the love of my life, and it was great. We mainly rolled around in his bed complaining about how hot it was, but our time spent together was amazing. The reason why I’m so excited about getting a whole day to do nothing with Mike is because we get to do that once every…4 or 5 months. We’re so busy between his constant work schedule and mine which is usually all over the place. Not getting to see each other much was actually a big problem at the beginning of this past school year. I literally only got to see him once or twice a week. Now, I know I could have it worse. I could be in a long distance relationship and only get to see my boyfriend once every few months. I give people in serious long distance relationships MAJOR credit. But seriously, it’s a bit upsetting when it feels like you’re in a long distance relationship and the person literally lives like 20 minutes away from you.

Thankfully, we worked things out and he’d come up to my college about 3 nights a week and we’d go to the gym together and then he’d spend the night in my college-owned apartment. But then I got fat and lazy and tutorial got in my way, so I stopped going to the gym, but instead of him not coming to see me, he got a membership at a gym that’s 5 minutes away from my apartment. His work is about 15 minutes away from my campus, so he’d drive from work to the gym, and then come see me. So thankfully, the whole “we never get to see each other” problem got solved.

I really do think he’s the one. Which is exciting and kind of scary at the same time. I can see myself being with him for the rest of my life, and I want to be with him for the rest of my life. I don’t want anyone but him. Jesus, when we broke up for a very brief period of time earlier this year, it felt like my world was ending. I don’t know how I managed to function normally for that month that we were apart. As soon as he asked me back out I instantly said yes without a second thought, I need him in my life. It was so nice getting to just lay in bed with him for the majority of the day, and do nothing but stare and smile at each other. Numerous times I thought to myself, “Wow, I love him with all of my heart, and I want nothing else but to be with him.”

Seriously, who else am I going to drink/eat applesauce out of the jar with? It’s silly things like that that make me realize how perfect we are for each other. He just makes me so happy, and all I want to do is make him equally as happy. Even when I don’t get to see him, and I miss him terribly, just thinking about him brings a smile to my face.

There are things we do to make each other mad or annoyed, it happens. While we’re so similar, we are still different people with semi-different beliefs on things or behaviors, that’s any couple. We talk through things though, and even though I suck at communicating my feelings and tend to bottle things up when I’m mad because I don’t like confrontation, I’m working on my habits because we’ve established that clear communication is key to our relationship working.

Now, I know things happen and people change as do situations. I know from personal experience that you may never truly know who someone is and what they’re capable of until they blindside you with a break-up. My own break-up with Mike earlier this year, though not nearly as painful or messy as some of the ones I’ve witnessed with my friends, destroyed me. It came out of left field, totally unexpected, and it turned my world upside down. He was doing it for the right reasons: break up now before we get in too deep and then I have to move away and leave you (since he does game design and all the jobs for that are in California, and he REALLY wants to move there, and soon). In my desperation to keep him, I told him that I was willing to go anywhere with him if it meant I could continue being with him, and I truly meant it. It wasn’t the emotions and crazy hormones, because I meant it with all of my being, and I still feel the same now after we’ve been back together for the last 5 months. I would follow this boy to the moon and back. So, in order to really make sure we can be compatible in a living situation together, he asked me to move in with him. I currently don’t have the money, but as soon as I do, I’ll be knocking on his door with my stuff in tow. If we can make it through this next step and still like each other at the end of it all, then we’ll know that we can live together peacefully in California together, and start our own lives out there.

Again, I know shit happens, but I’d rather risk getting my heart broken on the other side of the nation that sit around and wonder, “What if?” while being completely miserable for however long it would take me to move on and get over him (which would be a veerryyyy long time, trust me, I don’t let go too easily, especially when it comes to Mike).

I know I just wrote my whole autobiography of my current love life in order to explain why I posted more lovey-feely posts than I normally do, but it’s nice to write out all of my feelings I’ve been having lately (especially today), it kind of validates what I have been feeling lately. As if to prove to myself that all of these thoughts and feelings are real and not fleeting, that it’s not entirely crazy that I feel like I’ve found the one for me.